Letting go of OUR plan, saying yes to HIS

Blogging seems to have taken a backseat to huge life events, hence the 2 months of silence from me. May was the month of finishing my CD and almost-the-wedding plans. June was completely full of family arriving in Montana to celebrate, a glorious wedding weekend, and a beautiful honeymoon on Maui. July already seems to be flying by as we are back in Montana for a short time to get ready to move in to “our” camper and head out to the open road! My real reason for not writing so far is that I really have no idea how to sum up all that has taken place, how to express the richness of these last couple months as God has brought so many dreams to pass. Should I just carry on and start writing about the next thing? Or should I attempt to share it all with you so that you know what’s been going on in my world?

Well, I suppose I could attempt to sum it up.

It’s all about relationships.

That is the theme of every story in the past weeks and months. Yes, there were some important events… but even in the ways that those events unfolded it was clear that God was clearing space for relationships to grow and deepen. Take our wedding for example: We had planned a beautiful outdoor event in the forest with a reception in the backyard of some family, with me thinking, “it’s June… the weather will be perfect.” Ha! The morning before the wedding day, a layer of snow covered the ground that needed to be very dry in order for things to go according to OUR plan. So that Friday morning plan B kicked into full gear. The only thing was, plan B wasn’t exactly planned besides the church where it was going to take place. As my plans came crumbling down, I watched as the friends and family that surrounded us rolled up their sleeves and dove in to make this wedding happen. And not just happen, but it was more beautiful than I could have hoped, because it had been built on the love and hard work of people who David and I have deep relationship with. As we stood in that room surrounded by people that love us, I felt so cared for and carried by them… much more than if they had just been guests at a perfectly planned event.

This theme of relationship continued into our honeymoon on Maui, the small island packed to the gills with people who have known me since childhood. In the plane on our way over the Pacific, I coached myself in saying “No” to people who wanted to spend time with us, since afterall, this was OUR honeymoon. But as soon as we arrived I felt my attitude beginning to shift. I was realizing that Maui isn’t just a beautiful place that i wanted to show David, it is an island of people that I wanted to show David. We talked about it and decided to throw ourselves into the lives of people that are incredibly invested in me and my family, and now, into David’s life as well. We spent such sweet time with precious people in those 2 weeks and not once did we feel overextended or like we didn’t have enough time for each other. And we were over-the-top blessed by them as they poured out on us with generosity and support of our new direction to share my music on the road. The blessing of God was unleashed as we said yes to HIS plan, which as always, was people.

And we feel that this has all be preparation for the next step which again will be about investing in and nourishing relationships we have across the country. Our entire route for our tour has been planned based on where we have a friend or family member who wants to host us and believes in my music.

So feeling very refreshed (and very tan) we are getting ready to head out this week! We will be making our way through Wyoming, visiting some family of David’s, and then on to Fort Collins, Colorado, where we’ll be spending some time with my family and I’ll be sharing music on a few occasions as well. (If you live in either of those places and have an idea of a way for me to share my music in your community, please let me know so we can make the most of every opportunity!)

This blog will be where I make frequent updates on our travels and share stories from the road, so stay tuned!

If you are reading this, it is quite likely that you are one of those people that we have the blessing of relationship with…. Thank you! We love you!

The Coming Glory has arrived!

Just a quick note to let you know that my CD is done and ready to be in your hands!… or even better, in your CD player or iPod!

Kirsten Melrose: The Coming Glory

Enjoy! And may God use these songs to draw you into deeper intimacy with Him, and into the story that He is telling!

A Bride Who Is Ready

In Jewish tradition, when a man and a woman were engaged to be married, the time of the wedding was set for whenever the groom finished preparing a space for them in his father’s house. The bride’s job was to be ready for him at any time. She didn’t know when he might be done and come to sweep her away to the wedding ceremony. If she wasn’t ready at any given moment, she could be caught unprepared. Even in the night, an oil lamp was lit to let him know that she was ready for him then.

Jesus said to his disciples in John 14, “In My Father’s house are many dwelling places; if it were not so, I would have told you; for I go to prepare a place for you. If I go to prepare a place for you, I will come again and receive you to Myself, that where I am, there you may be also.”

Jesus is calling His disciples His bride. He’s saying, ‘I’m going away for awhile, but don’t for a minute think that I’m not coming back for you.’ And here we are, 2000-something years later, and we have yet to be retrieved by our bride-groom. But His promise is as true as the day He spoke it. He has been preparing a place for us so that we may go and be with Him, and meanwhile the story continues here on Earth. So we wait for His return, we anticipate our wedding day, though we don’t know the day or the hour.

Though, as I look around, it seems that instead of anticipating His return, we have forgotten altogether that we are to be waiting for Him. We’ve become distracted and discouraged. Distracted by the deafening call of the world to buy into the thought that this is all there is, we’ve believed the lie that life is about you finding your own happiness and fulfillment, so go out there and make it happen. It’s all about the Here and Now.

But there is supposed to be a hunger in us. There is supposed to be a longing that can never be quite filled. Because He has set eternity in our hearts, and we are made to hunger for heaven, to hunger for the day we will be face to face with our Creator.

Yes, but the Here and the Now is so easy to grasp, so satisfyingly instant. So we become distracted. Then when the world’s promises for fulfillment fall short, we become disillusioned and cynical. This is so far from what we need to be as those who hope in Christ! He is calling us to lift our eyes and fix our gaze on Him, the author and FINISHER of our faith. He has yet to bring this story to close, but He will. And we must be ready.

Have we become a bride that has forgotten that our groom is coming for us; asleep…disheveled…fallen out of love? Because He has not forgotten about us.

It is my firm belief that as the bride of Christ in this nation, we must get serious about the work of preparation, clothing ourselves with truth, love, unity, and a seriousness about God’s Word. Jesus is coming back to bring us to the wedding, and it is our responsibility to make ourselves ready for Him. I do not want to be one who finds herself unwilling and unable to run out and meet Him because I have not cultivated my readiness for Him. I am determined to grow an intimate anticipation for the moment that we will get to be together.

This has been a growing passion in my heart for the last year. This is the heartbeat of most of the songs I have been writing. This is the message I want to deliver. So, in my quest to find beautiful and poignant ways to say this one thing, I was able to collaborate with my dear friend, Erin Williams, who is a talented photographer, and who has a similar heart and style. We created a photo-series that visually portrays the story of my song I’m Coming Back, which embodies this message.

Please check it out to see the fruit of a serious labor of love… There are some ridiculous and fantastic stories that could be told about the making of this video, but perhaps that will be for another blog. For now, just watch and listen.

I’m Coming Back//Photo-Story

Spring In Montana

It is spring here in Montana. Well, today it is. The sun is shining into the breakfast nook at which I sit, the remnant of my breakfast still on the table, surrounding my computer. The mountains I am glancing up at between sentences are capped with snow and blaringly bright in the brilliant sunshine. There are trees outside, but no leaves yet, though some are the deep dark hue of evergreen. There is some green appearing in patches on the ground, as the grass decides that it will live again. This is particularly astonishing to me, as there were about 5 inches of snow on the ground yesterday. Today fits the bill for what spring is supposed to be. Yesterday, not so much. This manic rollercoaster between winter and spring, sometimes within one day, has left me trying to grasp ahold of a rhythm that keeps illuding me.

It also doesn’t help that I moved here one month ago from Florida… Spring, possibly even summer, in Montana is more winter-y than winter in Florida. I am by no means an expert in the seasons, seeing as I spent the larger part of my life in Hawaii, where we tell seasons by which coast the waves are hitting, and whether or not there are guavas on the road to Hana.
But even in the few years I have lived in places with distinct seasons, I have come to realize what a gift the seasons are, and how much I am designed to live within some outward rhythm that keeps me moving, yet keeps me grounded.

I’ve been thinking about these ideas for the last couple days after recently reading these words from CS Lewis’, The Screwtape Letters (in case you’re not familiar with the story, it is a series of conversations between demons, talking about how to keep people from having real relationship with God, whom they refer to as ‘the Enemy’),

“The humans live in time, and experience reality successively. To experience much of it, therefore, they must experience many different things; in other words, they must experience change. And since they need change, the Enemy (being a hedonist at heart) has made change pleasurable to them, just as He has made eating pleasurable. But since He does not wish them to make change, any more than eating, an end in itself, He has balanced the love of change in them by a love of permanence. He has contrived to gratify both tastes together in the very world He has made, by the union of change and permanence which we call Rhythm. He gives them the seasons, each season different yet every year the same, so that spring is always felt as a novelty yet always as the recurrence of an immemorial theme.”

These words ring true for me. I feel those 2 things at work at the same time inside me. I have sometimes thought my inner conflict between the love of change and love of permanence was a personality disorder… how can I want to live on the road AND collect teacups. Those two things just don’t go together! And though those two things may actually not practically go together (RV+porcelain=bad), the ideas behind both are from God. I value new experiences and exploring the unknown, and at the same time I value knowing that some things never change and there is a thread of constancy through my life.
He has synch-ed me to a Rhythm in which I am always changing and keep moving forward, but He is my Permanence, the Unchanging One, the Corner Stone. He is my immemorial theme.

So on this true Spring day (I’ve got to end this so I can go outside and sit in the sun!) I am reminded of God’s kindness to provide for that part of me that loves an adventure, and the part of me that loves a good cup of tea in grandma’s antique cup.

The update goes like this:
-My upcoming CD, The Coming Glory, is going to be done in few weeks! Keep an eye out for your opportunity to get a copy very soon! If you haven’t downloaded the 2 freebie songs, find those links on my last blog.
-We have an RV!… well, a truck and a 5th wheel camper… close enough! Thank you thank you to Eric and Shawna Nickisch who have offered theirs to us for the duration of the Kirsten Melrose+David Nickisch tour 2K10!
-Plans are coming together for the Melrose/Nickisch wedding extravaganza in June!
-We’re starting to set actual dates for performances this summer. Please let me know if you’re interested in helping set up a church or house show in your area!

Recent Adventures: Frontline Arlington

I woke up with these words in my head…. Some may trust in instruments, some may trust in voices, but we will trust in the name of the Lord. A perfect reminder as we started the day full of recording and then preparing to play in church in the evening…

That night I had the opportunity to be a part of leading worship at Frontline Arlington, a church full of really creative and talented young people. They set up for church every Monday night in an old theater that makes for such an intimate atmosphere, not to mention, a perfect place for playing and listening to music. This community of believers is incredibly vibrant… people were bringing food and coffee to give to the homeless, 4 people got baptized, their pastor spoke on what it means to authentically worship the Lord… it was such a beautiful thing to get to step into their world for the evening and see such passionate people. I was able to share with them my song I’m Coming Back, and to share the story behind it: Christ’s longing for His Bride, and a challenge for us to examine our lives and see if we are truly making ourselves ready for Him; Are our eyes and hearts fixed on Him, and not just on the here and now of this world? Do we live with a holy longing for ever-deepening intimacy with Jesus? And to play I’m Coming Back with such talented musicians who complemented the sweet and subtle song so beautifully. We also played my song This Is What I Bring, the perfect match for a service that was all about how true worship is submission and honesty. It was truly a pleasure to be a part of Frontline Arlington, and my prayer for this community of believers is that they continually have their eyes lifted, their gaze set on Christ, as they serve Him and the people He puts in their path, with diligence, until Christ’s return!

Click here to visit Frontline’s website!

Also, the album is coming along quite nicely, and to let you in on a little of what it’s sounding like, follow these links to download two songs for FREE! A-Yo!

Click here to download “This Is What I Bring”

Click here to download “I’m Coming Back”

Enjoy this taste of the album! Hopefully it gets you excited for what is to come! Thanks for your support…
K

Some thoughts from the studio…

I’m sitting in the cutest little house in Spingfield, VA, watching snow fall on the woods outside the warm livingroom. Downstairs is a beautiful studio with a microphone that seems like it was made for my voice, a gorgeous guitar that is taking the place of my poor Takamine that once again cracked it’s neck on the flight up here. I’m sipping Jasmine Green tea loaded up with honey to soothe my throat as my unfortunately timed cold takes it’s toll this morning.

So many things about this experience so far have seemed absolutley unfortunate. Tony (the guy who’s recording me) has been sick with food poisoning and he has had to conduct things from the couch in his control room. The next day I was battling stomach flu symptoms all day, too weak to do much other than sit and listen as we tracked drums all day on 3 of the songs. The area has had record breaking amounts of snow, causing some homes to lose electricity, which would bring this project to a swift halt.

But at the same time, so many things about this experience so far have seemed absolutely perfect, as though God’s hand is directing it and this was the plan from long ago. I am personally amazed at how much peace I have in the process. God has His hands gently supporting mine as I open them, letting go of my plans and saying YES to His.

I could get discouraged as I look around at the circumstances, but then how could I go downstairs and sing Take Courage, which tells the story of God’s encouragement to His people when things didn’t look the way they thought they were going to look.

I could cling to my own plans and dwell on the ways God seems to be emptying me of myself, but then how could I honestly sing Naomi’s Song, the story of God’s refilling of His precious presence when He empties us of ourselves.

I could just buckle down and crank out these songs though my heart isn’t in them, but then how could I allow myself to call the Church to stop going through the motions and surrender their hearts hearts to intimacy with Christ, as in Where Is Your Heart? I am challenged by the very words I am recording myself singing, and I need to be the first one to be taught by them if I want them to have any impact at all.

The more opposition we face in this recording, the more I am assured of the fact that God is doing something big. And in moments of discouragement I have been so grateful for the people that are surrounding me in prayer and support. Your prayers hold my arms up as I walk out what God has given me to do! Thank You!!

In the midst of all this, I am very pleased with the way things are coming together. The songs are really coming to life in a new way as some really talented musicians do their thing. It seems that we’re ahead of schedule as well… that’s one good thing about being snowed in, there’s nothing to do but lock ourselves away and get down to business! I’m excited to be able to share this album with you soon!

My Portion Forever

A few days ago I was driving down the Sebring Parkway with everything I own in my car. On one hand I felt like I was doing pretty well to have simplified my life so much that I can actually fit it all in my car. On the other hand it felt like it was still way too much. The pile of it is now sitting in Terrah’s (a kind friend who’s let me stay for a month)  living room waiting for me to go through it and downsize again, an event that happens pretty frequently even though there’s not much to begin with. It’s a strange feeling to have so little rooting me to a place. I feel like God is getting me more and more ready to head out in a new direction (which at this moment is in the direction of Bozeman, MT to be around the man I’m going to marry in June :).  But it’s also another reminder that my roots are not in any place… my roots are in Him.

This nomadic lifestyle can feel lonely at times; this constant state of unsettled is not for the faint of heart. But this morning I found a glimmer of encouragment as I sat down at the table (Terrah’s table) with my mug of coffee (my mug…soon to given away to some lucky recipient) and I opened up the Word (God’s Word). I’m reading my way through the Bible again and I am at Joshua. There’s a whole lot of land-dividing going on at the moment. But every now and then there’s a mention of a group of people I find myself relating to more and more. The Levites.

This is how things are going for the Levites as I read Joshua…

This guy’s family gets this land. That guy gets that land. “Only to the tribe of Levi he did not give an inheritence; the offerings by fire to the Lord, the God of Israel, are their inheritence, as He spoke to them.” (Joshua 13:14)

Give this guy’s family that section. That dude over there gets this portion for ever and ever. “[But] the Levites have no portion among you, because the priesthood of the Lord is their inheritence.” (Joshua 18:7a)

 At first I felt a little sorry for them… did they feel left out?… do they feel like the last kid chosen for the kickball team? And then I read again “…the Lord, the God of Israel, is their inheritence, as He had promised to them.” (Joshua 13:33) God is their inheritence. God promised Himself to them as they walked out the job He had given them to do. God set it up so that there would be a group of people whose lives were completely and totally given to worship and serve Him. They were a people set apart to minister to Him. Every resource they had went toward the tabernacle… nothing for themselves. But God promised to take care of them as they served Him. He wrote into His law ways that the Levites would be taken care of; parts of the animal that was sacrificed would be given to them for food; cities to live in and pasture land to raise the sacrificial animals were given to them by each of the other tribes of Israel. The Levite’s life was not about personal wealth… everything they had was for the service of the Lord.

Now, I realize that I am not a Levitical priest… not a descendant of Aaron or Abraham for that matter. But as I give my life to Christ I am part of a “royal priesthood, a holy nation, a people for God’s own possession, so that [I] may proclaim the excellencies of Him who has called [me] out of darkness and into His marvellous light.” (1 Peter 2:9) Peter was writing to Gentiles… people spread out and dispersed in lands that were not their homeland. He was writing to people with no permanent home, possibly shepherds who were always on the move. He was writing to landless people… promising them a permanent inheritence as they pour out their lives to honor God. 

So as I once again pick myself up and move to a new place for an indefinite amount of time… I am confident and rooted and settled. Settled on the fact that I will “obtain an inheritence which is imperishable and undefiled and will not fade away, reserved in heaven for [me].” (1 Peter 1:4)

God is my inheritence and my portion forever.

Update time:

1. I’m going to Washington DC to record an album on Feb 4th-12th with Tony Alany at Browndog Studios. Please pray for us be united and efficient in our goal to get it all done in that week!

2. I am engaged! David proposed on Christmas Eve and I said, “Yep.” We’re getting married in June in Montana, which is why I’ll be heading up there in a few months.

3. We are going to be doing some travelling after the wedding, hopefully in an RV that someone is going to lend us ;) , throughout the states. I hope to make some plans to play music  in churches/livingrooms of people I know. If you want us to make a stop in your town, please let me know!!!

Stop. Build A Team.

About 2 months ago my Pastor preached a sermon that I don’t remember at all. I couldn’t tell you what scripture it was from, what his key point was, or the powerful story he no doubt closed with, but there was one sentence that he said that I can’t get out of my head. Seriously, for the past 2 months this one sentence has been haunting me and has become the key point of this season of my life.

“You become the person God wants you to be as you spend time alone with Him. But you CANNOT accomplish the work God’s given you to do unless you function in the community of the local church and build a team of the people around you.”

Okay, so it’s 2 sentences. And he probably said it much more eloquently. But this idea, this word…TEAM…has been my default thought in recent months.

You see, my instinct is to be the lone ranger. I want to clear out on a crusade, with my cause and convictions, through the country causing change and challenging the Church (sorry, i got really excited about alliteration in that sentence).  But God has grabbed firmly ahold of my hand as I try to run ahead, and He has shown me that this thing is going to go differently than I thought.

I cannot do anything on my own. I will not accomplish the calling of God on my life without the people of God in my life.

I am still in the process of figuring out what this means specifically for the ministry that I feel God is giving me, but He has my attention in this area. As more and more of my generation decide that they can do Christianity without the structure of the community of God, I am increasingly aware of the fact that it is only in the locking of arms with each other that we will accomplish what God has given to the Church for such a time as this.

K

(this wasn’t meant to offend your sermon-writing skill, Pastor Randy… God used your mouth to say the words I needed to hear that Sunday :) .. so thank you.)

Recent Adventures: Minnesota

A couple of weeks ago I had the opportunity to get a fresh breath of air in Minnesota as the temperature had just started to drop and the leaves had just started to change color. I saw the trees hanging over the Mississippi River and quickly took a picture with my mind as traffic moved me along the river of I-94.

My time was full of rich experiences:

Reconnecting with precious friends,

drinking good coffee (thanks Common Roots),

eating a most delicious beet salad! (thanks Birchwood Cafe),

celebrating new seasons of life with very special people (Congratulations Cora and Jake),

and much reflection time for me… on where I had been and where I am going, and all that’s happened in between.

There was a lot of time to “just be” in the very familiar setting of Minneapolis, and there came a sensation I wasn’t sure I’d have…I didn’t long to return. I appreciated it for all the things I’ve always loved about it, and I remembered all that I went through and learned and all the passages of life I walked through while I lived there, and yet it didn’t need to be NOW. I was okay with it being THEN. It was like re-reading one of your favorite chapters in a beloved book. And it left me ready to dive into the next chapter.

 

While I was there I had the privilege to lead a time of worship in music at The Salvage Yard Church of Jesus Christ, the community I was a part of for some of the time I lived in Minneapolis. A friend accompanied me on accordian and drums (it takes some serious talent to play both at the same time!). It was a beautiful time and I am excited about what God is doing in that amazing group of people who are serious about walking out the gospel right where they are. And their hospitality in putting me up for the 2 weeks I was there left me so grateful for the Body of Christ, The Church, when we function the way God intended us to.

 

On Sunday morning I made my way out to the suburbs as I got to play a song at Bethany Church in Bloomington, a church that was a huge part of making me feel welcome to the Midwest when I first moved to Minnesota. I shared my song, I’m Coming Back, a picture of Christ’s longing for His Church who He is soon returning for.  This message seemed to be an echo of what the heart of this congregation already is focused on. It was so encouraging to worship with a group of people who are truly hungry for Jesus and are doing their part in ushering in His return with prayer and worship.

 

There were so many things about this trip that made me feel extravagantly loved and cared for. And there were so many encouragements along the way of His guidance. I really feel that God is moving me around to use me in whatever way He sees fit. And I am absolutely up for it.

 

Hopefully more churches to share with soon, and more adventures to report…..

Me and Mo (or would it be Mo and I?)

Moses. Now there’s a guy I can relate to. Every time I read about him I feel like I’ve found a kindred spirit.

He hardly ever had a home. A constant sojourner, his roots were in Heaven. Psalm 90 is accredited to him and it starts out, “Lord, You have been our dwelling place in all generations.” He seemed to have his eyes and his heart fixed on the Lord, and not on building for himself a comfortable life here on earth.

His life was marked with a sense of calling, not because of him being anything special, but because he was God’s chosen man for the moment. When God tells him what He’s going to have him do, he thinks of every possible reason why he is not qualified, capable, or even willing.

My favorite encounter in this season of his life is when he asks God, “What if they will not believe me or listen to what I say? For they may say, ‘The Lord has not appeared to you.’” God’s response to Moses’ doubt is that He tells him to take his  shepherd’s staff and throw it to the ground. When Moses did this, God turned it into a snake. God used what He had already put in Moses’ hands, the very thing that Moses used on a daily basis as he led the sheep around the desert of Midian…but He required that Moses throw it to the ground, let it go. When Moses relinquished it God inhabited it and turned it into something that would be a testimony of God’s presence with him. This is the miracle of being used by God, all you do is throw what you have at His feet, and He comes into it and uses it to draw people to Himself. God was reassuring Moses that people would recognize God’s annointing, and they would know it was about God and not about Moses. 

Another thing I love about Moses is that sometimes he seemed like a failure. He seemed to do what he was supposed to do, and yet things only got worse. He is obedient in telling Pharoh to let the Israelites go, and yet Pharoh’s response is exactly what Moses feared it would be, and he treated them even worse instead. I’m sure Moses was a little confused, he’d stepped out into the ministry God had called him to do, and yet it didn’t seem like God was really coming through with His end of the deal. But God was working on a bigger plan than Moses could see, and it involved getting him to realize just how desparately he needed God… Moses needed his failures to learn some valuable lessons. God’s bigger and better plan seemed like failure for awhile, but it was so that He could, “multiply His signs and wonders (Ex. 7:3).” He knew how He was going to display His power with the most impact, and Moses had to let go of how he thought it should happen, and let God do it His way.

Moses’ failures are incredibly encouraging to me. For it is often that things don’t look how I think they should look and circumstances aren’t as I think they should be, but God’s working on a level that I can’t even see, playing out His plan to bring the most glory to Himself. And I am learning to submit more of myself to Him, letting Him use me however He pleases, and surrendering my near-sighted definition of success. 

This barely scratches the surface of Moses’ life and his role in God’s story, but these are the specific ways that I’ve been learning from his walk with God.